I watched a TED talk by Derek Sivers in which he says there is research on why you should keep your goals to yourself. Telling others of your goals is only good if your friends keep you in check. Otherwise talking about goals makes you feel as though you already achieved your goals. For me talking about goals makes me freak out about the future.
For those of you that don’t know I work in the ER mostly on weekends. This causes me to not want to go out and put more drama on my plate. Which in turn makes me stay home and do yoga while I watch a movie. This helps me prepare for all the good, bad, funny and in-between drama I come in contact in the ER.
Did I mention I get to work with some awesome people?
All of the people I work with are awesome and I can see why I gravitate towards getting to know them. You see they all have these amazing goals involving getting a better job, moving to a new state or moving on with graduate school. Last weekend it seemed as though they all sprung it on me they all were leaving / moving on this spring / summer. I was elated for them, really I was. They all deserve to do amazing things in life and I am happy for them all.
I felt like I would have a panic attack.
Where was I in life compared to all these amazing and brilliant people, but sick and not even in school at the moment. My cold had changed to a sinus infection and I was freaking out about future goals when I should have been asleep. Of course that is when all my great / bad / crazy ideas come, in the middle of the night when I should be happily dreaming and sleeping. I was wide-awake beating myself up for letting everyone else beat me to the game I so wanted to win. This game that I created in which I came to North Dakota to make a better life for myself.
It’s just a Game.
I remembered talking about the Super Bowl with a friend. How disappointed we both were that the Broncos had lost. I remembered that in the end the Super Bowl was just a game. I had made life into a game. I had forgotten to live in the moment and be present, instead of focusing on a future outcome.
I was so caught up in the wonderful lives all the people I work with were excited about, that I forgot to remember where I came from. I came here from a divorce, to finish school, to let myself feel my feelings and to heal. Not to move and find something better, or move quickly onto the next goal. I had forgotten how to just live.
After some meditation I realized that I could learn from those around me. See what their next move is and learn from that. I could stay put and be happy. I could just be in the moment and love where I am. I could go back to school after I got better, after I healed and when I was ready to move on. Not when I thought I should be ready. No more games thinking everything will be better in the future. Only living in the present.
Love the life you live. Live the life you love.
Do you ever get involved wishing for the future and not living in the present? Do you share your goals or keep them a secret?- FBS